Meanings are in people

Even though people use the same language to say the “same thing” on different occasions, each occasion is really different The interpreted meaning of the message depends upon things such as an accent, past experience, frame of mind, environment, knowledge and consequences of the message. Mead’s symbolic interaction theory postulates that as we interact with others, we acquire and internalize meanings associated with the various symbols in our lives.

1. When I was in eastern Tennessee on business, an associate and I ate at a local restaurant. We observed during the course of the night that I was getting different verbal responses from the server than my associate was. He was from Chicago, and talked like a Chicagoan. I was from downstate IL, and deliberately used my childhood accent to sound more like a Tennesseean. When I asked for something from our server, she would reply “Yes, hun”. When my associate asked, she would reply with a more vague “uhuh” She gave both of us friendly service, however, her verbal responses to me were more familiar than those she used with the Chicagoan.

Implication: The use of accent creates perceptions in the minds of those receiving messages. These perceptions impact the interpretation of the messages by creating affinity, animosity, recalling previous experience, or creating a presumption of political, economic or social contexts for the message.

2. In an interview with ABC's Diane Sawyer broadcast Dec. 16, 2003, President Bush displayed a variety of non-verbal cues. In the interview, Sawyer focused on the issue of Iraq’s weapons of mass destruction. Bush fidgeted; he blinked rapidly, sucked on his lower lip and sighed. His eyes darted around and his chin jutted out. Although his words were chosen to express confidence, some have been interpreted his non-verbal cues to mean that he was afraid of the line of questioning. Other possible explanations might be more consistent with his verbal messages: for example, that his frustration was one of having to answer a question he considered settled.

Implications: Non-verbal cues can reinforce or confuse the message intended by the initiator. Observers will more closely examine the non-verbal cues given by those with significant social standing than they might with others in conversation that is more casual. Analysis of non-verbal communication in political speech is often as politicized as the speech itself.

3. A salesperson sits across the room from his prospect. The prospective buyer is leaning back into their chair with their arms folded. The salesperson notices this, and concludes that his presentation is not well received. In reality, the prospect is leaning back for comfort, and has arms folded because the air conditioning is too cold.

Implication: Even if we understand that non-verbal cues are an integral part of overall communication, our own experience shapes how we interpret those cues, often misleading us to incorrect conclusions. If the salesperson in this scenario reflects their own disappointment, lack of confidence, or “surrender to the inevitable”, then they may indeed lose the sale, but for another reason altogether than the one they imagined. Communication must be approached holistically.

4. A lawyer coaches a young chiropractor who will take the witness stand in a trial. The lawyer’s advice? “Explain things in everyday terms.” The doctor does this, and the opposing attorney says “Funny, you don’t sound like a doctor.”

Implication: Sometime jargon and technical speech serves a useful purpose because of the meaning that people attach to its use. By foregoing the use of technical language, the chiropractor diminished his credibility as a witness, precisely because the jury would expect him to use a technical description which might then afterward be explained.

5. My mother taught me that couches were meant to be sat upon, not played upon. Therefore, when I encounter children (or adults) playing roughly on a couch, I conclude that they are doing something wrong. I have internalized the meaning of “couch” as a place to sit – and the children I observe have not.

Implication: Social interactions often involve conflicts due to different meaning associated with objects and symbols around us. An initial step to understanding is the proverbial “walk in the other person’s shoes”, or an attempt to define and understand the other person’s reference when interpreting symbols and assigning meaning to objects.